It looks like we have to remind ourselves to be adult these days!
We make jokes on social media, feeling proud for organizing our finances or even cleaning our bathroom counter…
If they were still alive, my grandparents would be rolling their eyes : )
Adulting is actually plain old self-management. It means taking care of our physical, emotional, mental and spiritual needs and responsibilities, so that we can function optimally individually and in our relationships with others.
What’s weird is that although previous generations had less technological assistance, they did not seem to need to remind themselves to be… adults.
What got in the way of our self-management?
Could it be our addiction to being busy?
Could it be our addiction to distracting our self?
Could it be our addiction to immediate gratification?
If we struggle with self-management, the first step is identifying what’s in the way of being responsible. What pain are we trying to avoid? What kind of support are we lacking? What skills do we need to develop?
In order to assess where we’re at with #Adulting, let’s take a look at the big categories of self-management:
1. Self-care: this is the most essential, and it’s made of four sub-categories – physical, mental, emotional and spiritual self-care. How well are you taking care of yourself in each of these categories? Let’s start with the most basic: are you sleeping enough every night?
2. Supportive relationships: a lot of people have replaced regular face-to-face meetings with close friends and family with instant messaging and video calls. We need face-to-face conversations and in-person activities to nurture real relationships. How close do you feel to your friends and family? Whom can you confide to?
3. Household management: is your household running smoothly? Is your home clean and can you find your stuff easily? Do you have food in the fridge and a clear plan to cook before it goes bad? Do you have stocks of basic necessities or do you regularly run out of toothpaste or toilet paper?
4. Finances: are your finances stable? Do you have a positive net worth or a clear plan to get there? Do you track your expenses to have clarity on where your money goes? Can you commit to a budget and save for future goals?
5. Commitments: do you have systems to organize your commitments? Do you show up on time to your appointments? How do you balance self-care with commitments to others? Can you say yes and really mean it? Can you say no?
Self-management is a journey, not a destination. We’re always going to have to work on something and that something will change over time. But if we have multiple challenges in our self-management, it’s time to improve! And if we have children, it’s never too early to get them started on their own self-management journey. Sooner or later, they will have to take care of themselves and their household as well.