The Art & Science of Dating in the 21st Century

Listening to stories from friends, family, and clients, it looks like dating these days has become more challenging than applying for jobs in a competitive market!

How do we navigate dating in an era when:

  • Getting acquainted does not always start in person?
  • Prospective partners might date multiple people at the same time?
  • Agreeing to being boyfriend/girlfriend brings as much - if not more - anxiety than getting married?
  • Mentioning a desire to get married someday is feared to be labeled as "desperate" or "pressuring"?
  • Marriage seems to require having all our ducks in a row?

If some people still move effortlessly from the first date to I Do and beyond without having to put much thought into it, for most people dating these days requires quite a bit of preparation and planning if it is to lead to the happy, healthy and long-lasting relationship that they very much desire.

This preparation and planning is what I call the Art & Science of Dating.

It’s a Science because there is a base of knowledge to acquire and a few competences to learn and practice. For example, do you know:

  • Where to meet more compatible prospective partners?
  • How to date online effectively?
  • How to become the best date ever and never NOT get asked for a second date?
  • What to focus on in the first few dates?
  • How to be confident and have fun while dating?
  • How to move gracefully yet purposefully through each stage of commitment?
  • When is it best to call it quit? When is the relationship ready for I Do?

It’s an Art because it’s a largely subjective practice co-created by two individuals who are wonderfully unique and very much driven by unconscious patterns and emotions. It’s magical when two people who don’t know one another that well yet “click”, fall in love, and choose to embark on a new relationship journey together.

Finding The One might seem challenging, yet more opportunities to meet prospective partners, less pressure to get married young, and plenty of available resources about dating and relationships mean that these have more chances than ever of being truly happy, healthy, and fulfilling.

A little preparation goes a long way!